Laura Stamps » Tips

Buckle Your Seatbelts….It’s Gonna be a Wild Ride!

Laura — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 13:00:54 +0000

Sorry I haven’t been posting and chatting as much as I usually do at Facebook, Twitter, and Goodreads. But I’ve been totally slammed for the last week, working out the millions of details involved in launching The Manigault Vampires serial.

In fact Kittyfeather Press publishing the vamp series in ebook marks a MAJOR turning point in my career. Yeah, this slut is finally positioned to take off and zoom into the stratosphere.

Alrightyyyy!

Seriously though, going back to Kittyfeather is a giant step on my career path. Kittyfeather Press is my publishing company, and the one that has always sold the most books for me. It’s the publisher that made me one of the most financially successful of the small press novelists and poets. I founded it in 1988, and it wasn’t until 2005 that I began allowing other publishers to sell and distribute my books.

What can I say? Five years later I’m not terribly happy with this arrangement and all the disasters I’ve managed to survive with a few of these publishers.

Yeesh!

So I’ve decided to take back some control by giving the vampire series to Kittyfeather to publish as serial ebooks.

Because Kittyfeather is my company that means it moves fast like me, and everything it does is unusual and different. I know, but I can’t help it. Being “normal” is such a snooze. LOL

So if you wanna keep up with me, you need to get on my email list.

Many of you from Twitter, my Facebook Fan Page, and Goodreads are already on my list. But many of you aren’t. Those who are receive my monthly newsletter, my twice-a-week blog notifications, and soon a monthly notification to let you know when the next installment in The Manigault Vampires goes on sale.

As you know, I’m busy as hell these days, writing new novels and keeping up with my fast-track career. That means this email list is the only way my readers and fans can keep up with everything that happens to me. It’s also the only way you’ll find out about ALL the cool stuff I’m creating for you.

There are a few ways to get on my email list if you aren’t already. You can sign up for my Newsletter under the “Contact” button on this site at http://www.laurastamps.com/contact/newsletter/

Or you can send me an email at laura@laurastamps.com and I’ll add you to the list.

Whatever you do, GET ON THIS LIST! Why? Cause the SexWitch is free at last and ready to rock n’ roll.

Yeah, it’s gonna be a wild ride. I guarantee it! *naughty grin*

xoxo
Laura Stamps ©
The Magickal SexWitch
Author of Paranormal Erotica & Romance Novels
(Witches, Shapeshifters, Vampires)
laura@laurastamps.com
For HOT vampire erotica go here:
http://www.avampskiss.blogspot.com
For my naughty blog & novel series:
http://www.LauraStamps.com
My “Laura Stamps” Fan Page at Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/sexwitch
Follow me on Twitter at:
http://twitter.com/sexwitch

Wanna Tarot Card Reading?

Laura — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 13:00:45 +0000

Since everyone knows me as an erotica novelist and a shameless slut, it’s easy to forget I’m also a Wiccan Witch, empath, and psychic. That means I’m a deeply spiritual, woo-woo kinda person. No doubt about it. LOL

So it shouldn’t come as a surprise that I do tarot card readings. In fact, I don’t make a move in my career without consulting the tarot first. Why? Because the tarot is never wrong.

Never.

My trip to Boston last fall was a good example. I needed to go up in September to shoot a series of videos with my agent. And I wanted to go before it got too cold in New England. As you know, this Southern Belle does NOT like cold weather. Horrors!

The problem was Mercury had gone into retrograde in September. Okay, I also mix astrology and numerology as well as my psychic ability with my tarot card readings. When Mercury goes into retrograde everything becomes a cluster-fuck. You do NOT want to travel in airplanes during that time. So I did the tarot to see which weekends would be good for travel, trying to avoid that nasty retrograde period.

Not happening.

The tarot wanted me to travel during that time, and it particularly liked the last weekend in September. I told my agent, and he said he’d rather I come during the week. I did the cards again. Not happening. The tarot wanted me to come that weekend. Period.

At the last minute my agent’s schedule changed, and he said he could see me that weekend after all. I went up, and as you read on my blog last September it was an extremely successful trip. We got lots of work done, and my flights were all on time and perfect.

So I’m reading the tarot Sunday night, going over some aspects of my career I needed biz answers for. Suddenly, the spirits tell me it’s time to let everyone know I do tarot card readings.

What?!

Let me back up. I’ve done tarot card readings for decades, and they’re very popular with my readers/fans. That’s because I mix tarot with astrology, numerology, and my psychic ability, so my readings are incredibly accurate.

What can I say? The tarot is never wrong.

It’s been twelve years since I let all of my readers/fans know I do tarot card readings. My book schedule has just been too hectic. Usually what happens is a fan will email and ask if I do readings and could I do one for her/him? So I reply with the fees I charge and do the reading. I just never tell everybody about it.

So when I heard that from the spirits on Sunday night I felt like one of the Witches in my novels. If you’ve read my “Witchery Series” trilogy you know what they see in the cards shocks them sometimes. But the tarot is ever wrong, so they do what it advises, and so do I. You know me. I have a tendency to walk my talk.

That means I did the cards on this, and sure enough it is time for me to let everyone know I do tarot card readings. The spirits say some of you have questions about your job situation, future, income, love life, etc. And you need answers. Yeah, these are crazy times for sure.

Of course, the minute I decided to follow the tarot and tell all my readers/fans I do readings a deep peace settled on my soul.

Damn! The tarot is never wrong, ya know? It’s no wonder my offbeat career has always been a success. I let the tarot plot my every move.

So I’ve created a new blog just for my tarot card readings. I only do email readings, which means you’ll have a copy of your reading on paper to refer to. Plus, I’m too busy to talk on the phone anyway.

I charge $25 for each question you want me to ask the tarot. You’ll find more info at http://www.tarotbylaurastamps.blogspot.com .

That’s it. Enjoy!

xoxo
Laura Stamps ©
The Magickal Sex Goddess
Author of Paranormal Erotica & Romance Novels
(Witches, Shapeshifters, Vampires)
laura@laurastamps.com
To read excerpts from my novels:
http://www.LauraStamps.blogspot.com
Check out my verrrrry naughty blog:
http://www.LauraStamps.com
My “Laura Stamps” Fan Page at Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/sexwitch
Follow me on Twitter at:
http://twitter.com/sexwitch

Laura’s Naughty Sex Shop is Here…Yay!!

Laura — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 13:00:23 +0000

Alex has created the most awesome new feature for my site. It’s called “Laura’s Naughty Sex Shop.”

Oh, yeah. It’s exactly what it sounds like. *kinky grin*

This is a store where you can find all the products I’ve recommended on this blog (and more!) in one, convenient place. My fav erotica and paranormal romance novels, sex toys & kink, trashy lingerie, nonfiction sex books, and groovin’ music to fuck by.

Is that cool or what?!

I always say I’m a simple slut, and it’s true. So Alex and I have been working hard to make it easy for my readers to go to one place on this website to find all the sexy stuff I’ve raved about in my blog posts and comments.

Trust me. You’re gonna love everything in this shop from the books to the CDs to the dongs to the sexy lingerie to the nipple clips, and much, much more!

To find it, just go to the button bar at the top of the homepage. Click on “Shop!” That will take you directly to “Laura’s Naughty Sex Shop.”

When you get there, you’ll see six categories listed on the right side of the store. Browse through them, and if you see something that interests you, click on the title of that item for more info. If you decide to buy it, all you gotta do is add it to your shopping cart. The entire store is powered by Amazon, so it’s simple, simple, simple. No wonder I love it.

Okay, readers, go forth and SHOP! Yeah, definitely one of this slut’s fav things to do… *addicted grin*

xoxo
Laura Stamps
Paranormal Erotica & Romance Novelist
(Witches, Shapeshifters, Vampires)
To read excerpts from my novels:
http://www.LauraStamps.blogspot.com
Check out my verrrrry naughty blog:
http://www.LauraStamps.com
My “Laura Stamps” Fan Page at Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/sexwitch
Follow me on Twitter at:
http://twitter.com/sexwitch

My Naughty Pics

Laura — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 14:00:15 +0000

Great news! Alex has been hard at work on the “Photo” page of my website.

Yay!

Originally, it took you to my Facebook Fan Page and then on to my pics at Flickr. But not all my readers and fans have accounts at Flickr and Facebook, so I wanted the page to be designed differently. I wanted everyone who came to my website to be able to see my naughty pics at my site without having to leave it and go two other places (okay, I’m a simple slut, and I like everything in my life to be simple, including my website *LOL).

So Alex worked her magic last week. And now not only can everyone see my lingerie pics at my website, but they’re soooooo gorgeous. I love the way she tweaked the colors to be so rich and vibrant. Is Alex the BEST, or what?!!

To see them, all you gotta do is click on “Photos” on the button bar at the top of the homepage. That will take you to the page with all my pics. Then click on the first pic to enlarge it. You’ll find descriptions of each pic at the bottom of the pic, plus an arrow to help you scroll through all the pics.

More good news. I sent Alex 5 new lingerie pics last week. Yes, I did! One of those is a pic of the leopard-print cami outfit I wear sometimes to my booksignings. Ya know, the naughty one with the red lace across my breasts that let’s me flash my nipples at people when my inner exhibitionist wants to come out and play. *kinky grin*

When those new lingerie pics go up on the site, I’ll let you know. In the meantime, enjoy the lingerie pics that are already there. I’ll also be adding pics this week from my booksignings and travels.

Stay tuned….!

Glorying in Me!

Laura — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 14:28:34 +0000

Would it surprise anyone if I told you I’m FED UP with Alpha men at the moment?!!

I didn’t think so.

Well, I am. Totally and completely fed up. Turns out I was right in my blog post last week. Obviously, aliens had invaded Wes’s bod when he said all those sweet non-Alpha things to me.

Unfortunately, it appears the Mothership left Columbia rather quickly, because on Wednesday Wes proceeded to say some incredibly mean Alpha things to me. Then he did it again on Thanksgiving. Argh!

True, he realized immediately after he said them what he’d done, and that he was in deep doo-doo with me. But you know what I said?

“TOO LATE!!!”

Thus, I’ve written off all the Alpha men in my life. I can’t think of a single Alpha man who has been kind and considerate to me lately, so they’re all in the same deep doo-doo as Wes. Oh, yeah, I’m freakin’ fed up with Alphas!!

And speaking of Wes, he said these things to me too late in the day for me to hop in my car, crank up Aerosmith really LOUD, and visit some of my friends at the mall. I call that “Plan A,” and it always restores my good mood.

Instead, I had to go with “Plan B,” which involves dumping all the Alpha men in my life and spending some time glorying in myself.

It’s funny but this latest “Wes incident” reminds me of something I said to one of my Wiccan friends last week. We were talking about going with the flow and trusting the perfect will of the Goddess to guide us. Even when all hell breaks loose, it’s just the next step on our path taking us to greater good (painful as that step might be).

Once again, that’s true of this recent Alpha thing. It made me realize I’m looooong overdue for some “Laura Appreciation” from the Alphas in my life.

Why? Because the Alpha men in my life have a tendency to take me for granted every 3-4 months. Then it’s up to me to give them a wakeup call.

Okay, it’s my own fault, and I know it. I’m just one of those perpetually happy Betas, ya know? I can’t help it. I’m positive, perky, hard-working, easy to get along with, not moody, and ALWAYS ready to fuck. What’s not to like, right?

And that’s the problem. What they say about the squeaky wheel getting the grease (attention) is the truth. Since Betas aren’t Drama Queens (in other words, we don’t “squeak” 24/7), Alphas tend to take us for granted. They figure we don’t need any attention. In fact, they get to the point where they don’t even talk to us politely anymore. They forget we’re human just like everyone else.

Here’s a newsflash for all Alpha men: Beta women have hearts and emotional needs, too. YES, WE DO!!

So when the Alphas in my life get to the point where they think they can run all over me and it’s okay (NOT!), then it’s time for me to pull back and glory in my own private “Laura Appreciation” party.

Hey, I highly rec this for every woman, especially all those sweet, happy Beta women out there. True, it’s wonderful to get strokes from the men in your life. But you’re not gonna get that many from Alpha men. Sorry. It’s just a fact of life. So you need to develop the habit of becoming your own cheerleader and glorying in your wonderfulness.

How? Pull back, Beta women, emotionally and verbally from those Alpha men who’ve been taking you for granted, and let them live without you for a while. Throw your own private appreciation party. Then surround yourself with nourishing girlfriends and have a blast!

Trust me. It won’t take long for your Alpha men to get the message and see the error of their ways if they care about you. Why? Because a Beta woman is the light of an Alpha man’s life, and Alphas adore us for it. When we remove our dependable, consistent, happy, perky presence, life is darker and not as much fun for those intense Alphas, and they freak.

But for some bizarre reason they keep forgetting how important we are to them. Thus, the need for periodic reminders from us.

Argh! Can you say frustrating?!!

So if you’re an Alpha man in my life, I’m putting you on notice. Your ass is grass as far as I’m concerned. This Sex Goddess is gonna be busy for a while throwing a love-fest for herself until further notice.

And guess what? You’re NOT invited….!

xoxo
Laura Stamps (c)
Author of Paranormal Erotica & Romance Novels
Check out my “Laura Stamps” Fan Page at Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/sexwitch
Follow me on Twitter at:
http://twitter.com/naughtypussycat

How to Find the Good Stuff

Laura — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 13:47:22 +0000

Can you believe there are almost 500 blog posts on this website?

Wow!

No kidding. Totally blows my mind. Hey, I knew I was a chatty slut, but I had no idea I was THAT prolific. LOL

To give you some background, I started my Naughty Author Blog at LiveJournal in June of 2008. In the beginning I posted seven days a week. Now I only post on four or five weekdays. Turns out many of my readers don’t read blogs on the weekend, so I stop posting on Saturdays and Sundays. That means I try to write an informative or sizzling hot post on Fridays to get everyone through the weekend. See? I can be considerate. Sometimes. LMAO!!

Along with the blog posts there are also book review posts and posts that contain reader comments. Those of you who’ve been with me for a while know I get lots of fan mail every day. Being the chatty person that I am, I like to post some of those comments about me, my books, blog, pics, and website for everyone to read. Hey, not my fault! My fans say some pretty cool things.

Anyway, to help you navigate this massive amount of naughty info, I spent a few hours this weekend working on the tags for each post. The tags are the words swirling at the bottom of the homepage. Just put your cursor over them, and they start to move. No doubt about it. Tags rule on this site.

For example, let’s say you wanna read all the sex blog posts. Just place your cursor over the tag swirl, and when the word “sex” floats by, click on it. That will take you to a list of all the sex posts on this website, beginning with the most recent and going all the way back to June of 2008.

Or maybe you wanna read some of the comments from readers and fans. In that case, click on “reader comments” in the tag swirl. If you’d like to see all the nonfiction sex books and erotica novels I’ve read and raved about on this blog, click on the tag “now reading.”

If you’re looking for my posts on sex toys, click on the tag “toys.” And any time I’ve written a post, giving slutty advice on sex, men, women, or relationships, you’ll find it under the ”tips” tag.

Neat how that works, isn’t it? Yeah, Alex (my brilliant web designer) is amazing the way she set this up. So any time you’re looking for all the blog posts I’ve written on a certain topic, just check out the tag swirl.

Oh, how I ADORE organization! And why wouldn’t I? It leaves me more time to attack Wes for sex. Duh. Gotta love it, ya know?! *horny grin*

The Elusive O

Laura — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 14:25:01 +0000

Whoa! Friday the 13th. Lucky, lucky day!

Okay, this has been a week full of talk about sexual fantasies and how they can propel your O (orgasm) to new heights. Or just make an O possible. So I thought I’d talk a little about that today.

But first, the basics. Lots of women have a hard time achieving an O. They do. Even me. Really. I lost my virginity when I was 18 and didn’t have an O until I was 21. HORRORS!!

Men in their prime can have an O with no problem. But for women it’s a whole new ballgame. Most of us need help in the form of education, and many of us don’t get it.

Of course, there are always those women who have O problems because they’re natural subs and need the additional stimulation of a dom masterful in BDSM techniques. But for the rest of us, a problem having an O is usually because we’re thinking too much.

Amazingly simple, isn’t it? I wish someone had told me that when I was 18. ARGH!!!

Anyway, the fact is you really shouldn’t be thinking during sex. Why? Because sex is NOT about thinking. No wonder I had such a hard time having an O back then. I kept “thinking” it was gonna happen at any minute, and it never did.

It wasn’t until I finally realized that an O is all about “feeling” that I finally had one. And you thought I was kidding when I say I do all my thinking from the waist down. Nah, that’s just my secret for being a multi-O woman. Alrightyyyy! *horny grin*

So if your lover has a good sexual technique then you’re probably not having an O because you’re thinking too much.

I still remember what that was like. There I was, grooving on the tasty things my lover was doing to my needy bod, when all of the sudden worries from the day or stress about whether I was finally gonna have an O flooded my mind. Eeeeek!

And my O was foiled again. Rats!

But that won’t happen when you shut down your brain, go into your bod, and just feeeeeeeel. Focus all your thinking on the physical and how good your lover’s hands and mouth feeeeeeel on your nipples and clit. How good his hard cock feeeeeeels sliding in and out of your wet pussy. Whew! Makes me horny just typing that. Okay, I’m reallllly suggestive. *lusty grin*

But what if you’re one of those cerebral people who can’t turn off her brain? Then you need a few good fantasies to occupy those overactive brain cells. What? You don’t have any? Then get some, girlfriend!

A popular fantasy among women is to pretend you’re fucking a hunky movie star instead of your lover. Hey, don’t feel guilty about that one. It’s kinda kinky when you think about it. In fact, this one is so popular I even tried it a few times. But my brain kept shutting down, and my pussy took over, and well, ya know. Okay, I’m obviously NOT a cerebral person. But I gave it my best shot. Really, I did! ;)

Another popular source for sexual fantasies is to pretend you’re acting out a fav sex scene from an erotica novel. Not only have my readers told me they use my hotter novels as sex manuals, but they also use them as fuel for their sexual fantasies (especially “Call of the Witches” because of the sex dreams in that novel). So if you need some material for sexual fantasies think about some of your fav erotica novels.

In my blog post yesterday I mentioned Wes now has a sexual fantasy. When he was having trouble achieving an O all I had to do was remind him of that yummy kama sutra position we did on a recent sex date, and he roared his climax. That means awesome sex you’ve had in the past can be another source for sexual fantasies.

As you might imagine I have a very fertile and kinky imagination. It should come as no surprise I have a LOT of sexual fantasies I use during my self-servicing sessions. Those are the times when I start off thinking with my brain and finish up thinking with my pussy. In my case, these are all fantasies from my cybersex adventures and involve my cybersex guys (sorry Wes!). Hey, you gotta go with what works for ya, right? *kinky grin*

So if you’re having trouble with your Os, try this. Stop thinking with your brain! Think with your pussy. Your bod will thank you for it. If you can’t stop thinking with your brain then create some hot sexual fantasies and think about those instead.

Okay, the weekend is almost here so it’s time to think S*E*X. Yay!!! Maybe I’ll add to my kinky collection of sexual fantasies this weekend. Let’s see….there’s the one about exhibitionist sex in the office elevator, the one about a sex vacation to Key West, the one about hot sex on a sofa, the one about kinky corporate sex on the boardroom table, the one about smoldering sex in the corner of a bar (whew!…that’s a good one), the one about sweaty sex on the dance floor (whew!…another good one), the one about hot sex up against the office wall, the one about ménage sex in the shower, the one about….well, ya know.

Ahhhhhhh, life is good. Can you tell? *lusty grin*

Eating Wes for Dessert. Not!

Laura — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 13:51:24 +0000

“What’s this?” Wes asks, sitting down to dinner last night, eyeing his plate as if it’d just landed from Mars.

Okay, I’m an organic vegetarian, and Wes is a meat and sugar boy. But he eats some of my vegetarian dinners during the week (usually on the weekends) to keep his weight down and because he knows it’s good for his heart. But that doesn’t mean he has to like it. LOL

“I forgot to buy organic peanut butter at the store today,” I say, digging into my vegetarian meatloaf, organic mashed potatoes, kidney beans, and peas. In case you’re wondering, there’s no way Wes would eat veggie loaf. I know. I’ve already tried. “So I ground up cashews and walnuts and mixed them in tahini.” When he looks at me like I’m speaking ancient Aztec, I add, “Tahini is sesame seed butter. Very nutritious. How does it taste?”

“The jury’s still out,” he replies taking another bite and then stuffing a few organic poppyseed crackers in his mouth.

Do I take good care of the man, or what?! LOL

“Those are all Omega 3 oils,” I say, waving my finger at his plate. “Much better for your heart than that fast-food hamburger you wanted.”

Wes just grunts and stuffs more crackers in his mouth.

“So,” I ask, “you wanna fool around after dinner in the bathroom?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

Wes glares at me. “Because I don’t feel like it.”

“Don’t you wanna see if the testosterone shot is still working?” I waggle my eyebrows at him. “It’s been like two days since we had sex, and I’m neeeeeeedy.”

“Forget it. The shot’s not working.”

I fall over laughing. I’m sorry. I can’t help it. The man is just too funny!

“Why are you laughing?” he asks, narrowing his eyes. “You’re up to something.”

“Ever thought about swinging?” I ask, trying to look innocent.

“Swinging? What’s that?”

“Ya know,” I reply. “That’s when you fuck another couple. One of my Facebook friends just asked me about that.” I shrug. “I get offers all the time for swinging and for a third in a ménage.”

“I know what swinging is,” Wes snorts. “I’m not three years old.” By now he’s finished half his sandwich, and he’s still alive. So far so good. LOL

“Then why did you ask?”

“I dunno,” he replies, stuffing his mouth with more crackers. “But there’s no way in hell I’m swinging.” Then he glares at me. “And neither are you.”

“Okay, wanna fool around after dinner?” I ask again, grinning like crazy.

“No!” Wes bellows. “Jesus, you’re aggravating.” He points to the erotica novel next to my plate. “Read your book.”

“But it’s rude to read at the table when you’re having dinner with your husband,” I protest, trying not to laugh. “Aren’t you glad you’re married to me?”

“Usually, but not tonight,” he says, getting up with his almost empty plate. “You’re driving me nuts.”

After I clean the kitchen and the litter boxes, I go into the den and perch on the arm of Wes’s reclining chair while he watches sports on TV. “I’m gonna check my email one last time, and then I’m crashing in the bed with the kitties.”

“Great idea,” he mumbles, never taking his eyes off the TV.

Then I lean down and whisper in his ear. “Wanna fool around with me in the bathroom?”

Wes starts laughing. “Damn, you’re persistent!”

“No, darlin’, it’s called HORNY.”

“Maybe in two days,” he says, shaking his head.

“Why two days?”

“Because I may feel like it then, and I don’t now.” He’s starting to glare at me again.

“But why don’t you feel like it now?” I ask. “All you’ve done this weekend is lie around and watch sports on TV. Your dick should be verrrry well rested.” I lick my naughty lips. “Yummmmmmy.”

“Enough!” he bellows. “You’re driving me crazy!”

I leap off the arm of the chair when he swats playfully at me and run up the stairs, laughing. Well, you can’t blame a horny slut for trying, ya know?

Sometimes getting Wes to fuck me is like making a cold sales call. If you make the call, you have a 50/50 chance of making the sale. If you don’t make the call, you have a 100% chance of failing.

As you may have guessed, failure is not my thing. And, yeah, I ADORE cold calls. Talk about a rush!! Not to mention, I’m really good at it.

Gee, what a surprise! *horny grin*

Look at My Dick….Wow!

Laura — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 15:05:52 +0000

Last night was the night. That’s right. Time for me to give Wes my first testosterone shot. Uh-oh. LOL

Hard to believe a month has already passed since the nurse gave him the first testosterone shot and showed me how to do it. Then when I got home that day I wrote down all the steps. Like 15 of them.

“Are you ready for your shot?” I ask when Wes came home for dinner last night.

“I’m terrified,” he replies, grimacing. “You’ve never given a shot before, and the one the nurse gave me was totally painless.”

“Wimp,” I tease. Okay, he’s scared of needles. “She said it’s just like throwing a dart.” I wind up like I’m throwing a baseball. “Pow!”

Wes cringes.

“Piece of cake,” I say.

After dinner we go into his bathroom, and he pulls out all the stuff, including my instructions. Testosterone is so thick the nurse gave me a bunch of huge needles to drain it out of the vial, and then smaller ones to use when I inject him.

Everything went smoothly, although drawing the testosterone out of the vial into the shot was harder than I thought. But those tiny air bubbles do disappear really fast when you flick the shot with your finger. Totally cool!

The nurse had showed me where to stab him in the hip, so I screwed the tiny needle on and threw my dart.

“Ouch!” Wes exclaims.

“Did that hurt?” I ask. Wow, I didn’t wanna hurt him, but I couldn’t believe how easily that needle went straight into his muscle. Like almost two inches deep. No resistance whatsoever.

Scary.

“No, it didn’t hurt, but I can feel it,” he says. “I couldn’t feel it when the nurse did it.”

“Must be that 4-year degree of hers, and all those years of giving shots.” I stick my tongue out at him. “How do you know the first shot she gave was painless?”

I pull back on the shot plunger. No blood. That’s a good sign. Means I got it in the right place. Then I push hard, because the stuff is so thick it takes a while to go through the tiny needle.

“I think I’m gonna be sick,” Wes groans.

“Is it hurting?” I ask, pushing the last of it into him.

“No,” he says. “But how do I know you got it in the muscle? It could just be in the skin floating around.”

“Relax, darlin’,” I reply. “No blood came into the needle, so we’re cool.”

“I dunno,” he frets, looking kinda green.

I pull the needle out and dispose of it. “Done!”

“Am I bleeding now?” he asks, looking kinda panicked.

“Just a spot,” I reply, swabbing it with alcohol like the nurse showed me and then placing a Band-Aid over it. “You bled like that for the nurse too.”

“I have to lie down,” Wes groans. “I think I’m gonna be sick.”

I just shake my head at the big bad Uber Alpha and clean everything up, while he rushes into the bedroom and collapses on the bed. The man worries too much, ya know?

A few minutes later I crawl into bed with him. “Are you gonna live?” I tease.

Wes laughs. “You did good. I’m sorry. I know I can be difficult.”

Duh.

“Not the word I would have used, but close enough,” I reply, rolling my eyes.

“I know you did the best you could, and you tried not to hurt me.”

“True,” I purr. “In fact, I think I deserve a reward.”

Wes laughs again. “You wanna have sex in the bathroom right now, don’t you?”

“Of course,” I reply, licking my naughty lips. “We just filled up your tank for another month. I think we need to take you for a test drive.”

Wes gives me a passionate kiss, and we leap off the bed and dash into the bathroom.

When he pulls down his sweatpants, his cock pops out, already semi-hard. “Look at my dick!” he exclaims. “That stuff works fast.”

“Oh, how I love a realllly hard dick,” I purr, as Wes strips off my cami and begins to worship my nipples with his talented tongue and fingers, grinding his hard dick against my eager pussy.

Yummmmmmmy!

Hey, you can just call me Nurse Laura from now on.

Of course, I’ve never actually throw a dart before. I was just winging it from what I’ve seen in the movies. But…shhh…don’t tell Wes. The man traumatized himself enough for one night, dontcha think? *wicked grin*

Testosterone Revisited…Yay!

Laura — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 13:04:09 +0000

Sorry about no blog post yesterday, but it seems I partied a bit too much at my reunion over the weekend, because that cold from Boston came back on me full-force on Tuesday. Yeah, I had a relapse. Bummer! But thanks to Benedryl, lots of napping, and my herbal cold remedies I got rid of it in 24 hours this time. Yay! However my brain cells were too fried to do a blog post yesterday, so that’s what happened. Wednesday’s blog post got lost in a cold meds fog. LOL

Okay, if you were reading this blog last fall you know I wasn’t very happy with Wes’s doc. He had done a bunch of blood tests on him, but the only one I was interested in was the testosterone test. That’s because I had a feeling Wes was about a quart low on the stuff, since his libido had been diminishing all year. Horrors!

Sure enough, the test results showed he was verrrrrrrrry low in the low range of normal. Yet his doc didn’t prescribe testosterone supplements.

Grrrrrrr…..!

So I took matters into my own naughty hands and started giving him sex boosting supplements that would spike his testosterone levels naturally. That worked for a while, until a drug rep golf buddy gave him samples of Viagra. Yowza! Love that stuff! So we’ve been doing Viagra ever since, and the rest is slutty blog history. *lusty grin*

A few weeks ago, his doc ran more blood tests on him. Everything checked out except his testosterone level (duh), which had fallen below normal into the low range. Now his doc was concerned. Finally! This time he prescribed testosterone shots for Wes once a month, and I’m the one elected to shoot him up.

So on Monday we went back to his doc’s office for the nurse to teach me how to do the needle thingy and give a shot.

Earlier that day my agent had called, and I told him about it. “I figure I’ll just wind up like I’m gonna throw a baseball (like I’ve ever done that before. Not.),” I tease, “and then…wham!…stab him in the ass.”

“Ouch!” my agent groans while I laugh like crazy.

Imagine my surprise when the nurse tells me I’m not too far off on that technique. Yikes! She said I need to do it like I’m throwing a dart. Wham! Fast and deep. Wes paled a little when he heard that. Hey, I would have too.

But that wasn’t the only surprise. Then she said the only place I could give him a shot was in his hip or ass.

Wes paled even more. For some reason he thought he could get the shot in his arm. Yeah, needles make him queasy, and he pretty much hates them. Then he thought about me giving him a shot in his hip or ass like I’m throwing a dart (like I’ve ever done that before. Not).

“Maybe I should come back here for the shots,” he quickly suggests to the nurse. He said this after the nurse gave him a shot in the hip that was totally painless even though the dosage of testosterone was large (thanks, Doc!).

But when he heard how much that would cost (like $90 per shot, not including the cost of the testosterone) he turns to me. “Okay,” he says, giving me a warning look, “my wife can do it, I guess.”

Yesterday morning when I wake him up, I ask, “Sooooo…..are you feeling horny yet?”

“No,” he replies, rolling over.

“You got that shot three days ago,” I continue. “Are you thinking about sex 24/7 now like I do?” I shake his shoulder. “Yes? Yes? Yes?!!” If I were a puppy I would’ve been wagging my tail.

Well, it’s EXCITING! I’ve been wanting this ever since some of my girlfriends told me they give their husbands testosterone shots, and it makes the guys chase them around the house like horny teenagers.

Alrightyyyyyyy!

“No,” Wes replies firmly. “I’m not thinking about sex 24/7 like you do. In fact I’m not horny at all.”

HORRORS!!!

Maybe this is a cumulative thing? Could be. Maybe next month I’ll give him the shot in his ass. Maybe that will make it work faster. I’ll just wind up like I’m throwing a dart and wham!

Don’t worry. I know how to do this now. There are like 15 steps to it, and I wrote them all down.

Maybe after that he’ll chase me around the house like a horny teenager. Maybe I’ll even add a little magick to the shot to help it work faster. Ooooh, I like that idea!

Yeah, it’s dangerous to mess with an oversexed Witch. Just ask Wes. He knows. *wicked grin*

xoxo
Laura Stamps (c)
Author of Erotica and Paranormal Romance Novels
http://www.LauraStamps.blogspot.com (to read excerpts from my novel series)
http://laura-stamps8.livejournal.com (my naughty Author Blog…updated daily *wicked grin*)