The Elusive O
Whoa! Friday the 13th. Lucky, lucky day!
Okay, this has been a week full of talk about sexual fantasies and how they can propel your O (orgasm) to new heights. Or just make an O possible. So I thought I’d talk a little about that today.
But first, the basics. Lots of women have a hard time achieving an O. They do. Even me. Really. I lost my virginity when I was 18 and didn’t have an O until I was 21. HORRORS!!
Men in their prime can have an O with no problem. But for women it’s a whole new ballgame. Most of us need help in the form of education, and many of us don’t get it.
Of course, there are always those women who have O problems because they’re natural subs and need the additional stimulation of a dom masterful in BDSM techniques. But for the rest of us, a problem having an O is usually because we’re thinking too much.
Amazingly simple, isn’t it? I wish someone had told me that when I was 18. ARGH!!!
Anyway, the fact is you really shouldn’t be thinking during sex. Why? Because sex is NOT about thinking. No wonder I had such a hard time having an O back then. I kept “thinking” it was gonna happen at any minute, and it never did.
It wasn’t until I finally realized that an O is all about “feeling” that I finally had one. And you thought I was kidding when I say I do all my thinking from the waist down. Nah, that’s just my secret for being a multi-O woman. Alrightyyyy! *horny grin*
So if your lover has a good sexual technique then you’re probably not having an O because you’re thinking too much.
I still remember what that was like. There I was, grooving on the tasty things my lover was doing to my needy bod, when all of the sudden worries from the day or stress about whether I was finally gonna have an O flooded my mind. Eeeeek!
And my O was foiled again. Rats!
But that won’t happen when you shut down your brain, go into your bod, and just feeeeeeeel. Focus all your thinking on the physical and how good your lover’s hands and mouth feeeeeeel on your nipples and clit. How good his hard cock feeeeeeels sliding in and out of your wet pussy. Whew! Makes me horny just typing that. Okay, I’m reallllly suggestive. *lusty grin*
But what if you’re one of those cerebral people who can’t turn off her brain? Then you need a few good fantasies to occupy those overactive brain cells. What? You don’t have any? Then get some, girlfriend!
A popular fantasy among women is to pretend you’re fucking a hunky movie star instead of your lover. Hey, don’t feel guilty about that one. It’s kinda kinky when you think about it. In fact, this one is so popular I even tried it a few times. But my brain kept shutting down, and my pussy took over, and well, ya know. Okay, I’m obviously NOT a cerebral person. But I gave it my best shot. Really, I did! ;)
Another popular source for sexual fantasies is to pretend you’re acting out a fav sex scene from an erotica novel. Not only have my readers told me they use my hotter novels as sex manuals, but they also use them as fuel for their sexual fantasies (especially “Call of the Witches” because of the sex dreams in that novel). So if you need some material for sexual fantasies think about some of your fav erotica novels.
In my blog post yesterday I mentioned Wes now has a sexual fantasy. When he was having trouble achieving an O all I had to do was remind him of that yummy kama sutra position we did on a recent sex date, and he roared his climax. That means awesome sex you’ve had in the past can be another source for sexual fantasies.
As you might imagine I have a very fertile and kinky imagination. It should come as no surprise I have a LOT of sexual fantasies I use during my self-servicing sessions. Those are the times when I start off thinking with my brain and finish up thinking with my pussy. In my case, these are all fantasies from my cybersex adventures and involve my cybersex guys (sorry Wes!). Hey, you gotta go with what works for ya, right? *kinky grin*
So if you’re having trouble with your Os, try this. Stop thinking with your brain! Think with your pussy. Your bod will thank you for it. If you can’t stop thinking with your brain then create some hot sexual fantasies and think about those instead.
Okay, the weekend is almost here so it’s time to think S*E*X. Yay!!! Maybe I’ll add to my kinky collection of sexual fantasies this weekend. Let’s see….there’s the one about exhibitionist sex in the office elevator, the one about a sex vacation to Key West, the one about hot sex on a sofa, the one about kinky corporate sex on the boardroom table, the one about smoldering sex in the corner of a bar (whew!…that’s a good one), the one about sweaty sex on the dance floor (whew!…another good one), the one about hot sex up against the office wall, the one about ménage sex in the shower, the one about….well, ya know.
Ahhhhhhh, life is good. Can you tell? *lusty grin*
xoxo
Laura Stamps (c)
Author of Paranormal Erotica & Romance Novels
Check out my “Laura Stamps” Fan Page at Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/sexwitch
Follow me on Twitter at:
http://twitter.com/naughtypussycat
Laura Stamps (c)
Author of Paranormal Erotica & Romance Novels
Check out my “Laura Stamps” Fan Page at Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/sexwitch
Follow me on Twitter at:
http://twitter.com/naughtypussycat
Entries (RSS)
November 13th, 2009 at 4:04 pm
Thanks Laura for all the O advice this morning! Oh, and by the way, sex in a mall elevator is a gooood one! You must try it! I am an exhibitionist as well, so I've had my share of sex in public places…….with my new bf, that is.
November 13th, 2009 at 7:19 pm
Awesome! Thanks for the tip!!
November 13th, 2009 at 7:42 pm
Hey, us girls have to stick together, don't we?
November 14th, 2009 at 2:38 am
Man O Man I wish I could read this in the morning time. I have to work and can not pull any of this up at work. But that is a good thing because i would not get anything done… LOL
This is always so much fun to read and man o man you make me laugh. I enjoy the way you just tell us all these things. So I look forward to coming home and having down time and reading all the great thing you write about. Man I think a girls night out with you would be a blast. I would probable laugh my ass off. I have always been one that enjoys watching and listening to people. You probably have a blast when you go out. Well since I am the mother of 4 kids I have not had much time to do those fun thing in life. But know that my kids are 20, 19, 16, & 14 I have a little more time for my self. Boy do I enjoy my time with my alpha man, more than I ever have befor. I think that the erotic reading , and talking to more woman that enjoy that, helps me feel comfortable with my self more than I ever have.
So Thank You Very Much!!!
November 14th, 2009 at 3:57 pm
Thanks! I'm glad you are enjoying my wild outlook on life and my crazy blog posts (lol)! Yeah, it might take you several days to recover from girl's night out with me. My agent said after 3 days with me in Boston that he thought I was "high maintanence." Not because I require a lot of attention, but because I have so much energy. When I protested, he said, "Laura, you have no down time." I replied, "Of course I do. I have down on a dick time. I have down on my back time. I have down and dirty time, etc." He cracked up and said, "I should have seen that coming." I replied, "Not my fault! You know how I am about word triggers." LMAO!!!
November 14th, 2009 at 7:06 pm
Yeah, my honey always asks me why I have so much energy, and I have no idea why! He is always so tired at the end of the day, so when I I am ready for some fun, he is always soooo tired. Grrrrrrr…………….
November 15th, 2009 at 3:22 am
Down time is to funny!!!
} I will never think of down time the same ever again. LOL Well one of these days we will have to have the girls night out and just enjoy the fun. But I might not be able to keep up, seeing as how i dont get that kind of time often. Just once in a blue moon ( as they say). I got all excited about buying tickets to the movie New Moon. i realy like the book series and cant wait to see the movie. Even though it would be better if the were a little more adult seens. But see what I mean, I realy need friends that are just a little more exciting. But I will spend time with my daughter and that is a good thing.
}
But if you ever want a girls night out I will try to keep up!!!
November 15th, 2009 at 5:43 pm
I just had an idea! I would love to have a girls night out as well, but we all live in different parts of the country. What if there was something like that all across the country for women like us? What do you guys think?
November 15th, 2009 at 6:47 pm
Kristen, I don't know exactly what you mean about an across-the-country-girls-night-out, but I do plan to have a chat in January on this website. I usually hold them for about 8 hours on a Friday so readers from all the time zones can particpate.
The last one was on my LiveJournal blog on September 19, 2008. Just go to the top of the page and click on "Archives." Then scroll across to September 2008. Then go down the list of posts in September until you get to "Blog Chat Today…big fun!" We had a blast. It looks like all 60+ of the comments transferred from the LJ blog when we moved it last month.
We started that chat off with a yummy pic of a hunky guy in white undies and a blue cownboy hat. The tenting on those undies was totally yummy. One of my readers posted it first thing, and it was the purrrrfect way to start one of my chats off. Too bad that pic disappeared after a few months. Anyway, you can click on the replies at the end of the main posts and see all the sexy conversations we had going on. It was a BLAST!!!
November 15th, 2009 at 7:29 pm
I knew what I was thinking of when I wrote that, but it's hard to explain. lol. I think the chat in January will be a blast though!!!!
August 2nd, 2010 at 5:33 pm
I just tried the link to follow you at Twitter http://twitter.com/naughtypussycat and it didn't contain anything???
August 2nd, 2010 at 10:53 pm
Hi, SLF! The problem is this is a really old blog post and they changed my Twitter account name about a month later. This is the current url: http://twitter.com/sexwitch
See ya there!