Wes Backpedaling….FAST!
Wes and I were on the way to the grocery store after lunch on Sunday when I got fed up with his cranky mood. I mean, the man had just spent three days in Santee playing great golf with his buddies. You’d think after a fun vacation he’d be in a relaxed, happy mood, right?
Wrong. He returned to Columbia on Saturday night a few hours after my booksigning. And all he’d done since then was complain about how tired he was.
Okay, I guess you can tell I don’t have much sympathy for Alphas who play a lot and complain about it. Plus, this time he didn’t come home with a cold, and his knee and back felt great. So what did he have to complain about?
Nothing!
“I don’t care how tired you are,” I finally say. “Just as long as you’ve got enough energy to fuck me this afternoon for our sex date.”
“We’ll see,” he cranks.
WHAT?!!!
“I’m underwhelmed by your enthusiasm for fucking me,” I reply, narrowing my eyes at him. “You act as though having sex with me is a chore. Or boring as hell.”
“I never said that,” he replies, glaring back at me. “You did.”
“Okay, fine,” I continue. “Then tell me this. I know you’re in love with me. But are you passionately in love with me? I don’t feel sexually desired by you when you act so ho-hum about fucking me, ya know?”
“Jesus Christ!” Wes exclaims, groaning. “Not that touchy-feely stuff again. I can’t take it!”
“Whatever.” Okay, now he’s really on my Shit List.
At times like this I think about all those Alphas who go into shock when their wives want a divorce. To them it seems sudden and out of the blue and they’re totally clueless how it happened. Right. Until the wife’s lawyer tells them this is what the wife has been trying to tell the husband for years, but always got the “Oh, no! Not that touchy-feely stuff again!” response. An Alpha acts like listening to his wife’s concerns about their marriage is a fate worse than death. Well, in a way it is, because it certainly leads to the death of their marriage. Duh!
Wes must have realized his boo-boo immediately, because he grabbed my hand and squeezed it, trying to make nice. But like I always say: too LITTLE too LATE! So all he held was a limp hand as he drove to the grocery store. A hand that would much rather be holding the hand of someone who is passionately in love with me.
Duh!
At 4:00, I finish up on computer and find Wes watching sports in the living room. “Are you feeling horny and tingly yet?” I ask, referring to the testosterone shot last week and the Viagra he took at 3:00.
“Nah,” he replies, walking up the stairs to take a shower.
In the meantime, I change the sheets and insert a Liquibead. Speaking of the KY Liquibeads, I learned something new about them this time. It was freezing cold on Sunday, and homes in South Carolina tend to be chilly in the winter. I think it has something to do with the heat pump technology we use for air and heat. Anyway, I guess the Liquibeads absorbed some of the cold from my chilly bathroom, because the bead took twice as long to melt inside me. That means next time I’ll need to insert one like 15 minutes earlier. Good to know now that our cold winter weather has arrived. 
Fortunately, this was not a problem on Sunday because Wes was incredibly attentive. Gee, I wonder why (LOL)? When I walk into the bedroom, he’s lying in the middle of the bed with the sheet draped over his dick. It kinda looked like a big tent, if ya know what I mean.
“Alrightyyyyy!” I squeal when I rip off the sheet. He wags his steely flagpole at me and then tackles me. But this time he’s verrrry intense. You could even say he’s passionate.
Gee, I wonder why? LMAO
“I like this,” I moan. Okay, I’m starved for affection. I’ll take what I can get.
“I’m trying,” he replies.
And he is. He acts like he wants me badly and spends twice as much time on foreplay as he usually does, which gives the chilly Liquibead plenty of time to melt.
When I roll on the condom and Wes slips inside me, he’s more enthusiastic about fucking me than he’s been in months (gee, I wonder why?). At any rate, it’s nice to know I’m not the only one grooving on how much I love to fuck.
“You’re so HARD,” I growl after another O.
“I know,” he agrees, smiling from ear to ear, while he pumps into me like a jackhammer. “I usually don’t feel much with these rubbers, but for some reason I’ve got more sensitivity today.”
Gotta love a full tank of testosterone, ya know? *lusty grin*
Finally, when I’m so worn out with Os and good fucking I’m actually getting tired (amazing, I know), he finishes. Afterwards, he cuddles with me for almost an hour, telling me how much he enjoyed fucking me, and how much he wants me, and some of the funny stuff that happened during his golf trip. Really cool, since he usually gets antsy after 20 minutes of cuddling and leaps outta the bed like he’s got something much more important to do.
All I can figure is Wes has been in the doghouse so often in the last year he’s becoming a Master at backpedaling.
Whatever. As long as I reap the benefits in the bedroom, what do I care? I know. I’m waaaaay too easy. But it seems to be working for me…. *slutty grin*
xoxo
Laura Stamps
The Magickal Sex Goddess
Author of Paranormal Erotica & Romance Novels
(Witches, Shapeshifters, Vampires)
laura@laurastamps.com
To read excerpts from my novels:
http://www.LauraStamps.blogspot.com
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December 8th, 2009 at 4:59 pm
Ok I totaly understand the Alpha not knowing what we are talking about. Man o man i have told my honey things about how i feel, and get that not the mushy stuff. Glade he got it so you two had a great date. Mine has been getting it these last few mths. So im liking our fun, hoping it last a long time. ^_^
December 8th, 2009 at 6:34 pm
I know, Mel. I think it's genetic in an Alpha. They think the touchy-feely stuff is gonna be so awful and it usually isn't. The trick is getting them to sit through it and actually listen. Of course, in Wes's case what works best is for him to KNOW I'm mad at him. That scares the shit outta him, because he knows I'm a happy Beta, and if I'm mad it's usually his fault. Uh-oh. LMAO!!!!
December 8th, 2009 at 7:28 pm
Nothing like trying to reason with a goldfish and thier 10 second memory.It must be spelled out in simple terms Laura.Very simply,using small words while making them sit still and look at you while youre moving your lips.when David is gone and he calls its all lovey dovey then when he comes home NOTHING,NADA.He thinks I should be falling all over him!!!! When he walks through the door I get an "I missed you' a peck on the cheek then he is off to the computer catching up on the sports news.Its like 'Ummmm…hello…it would be nice to speak to someone over the age of 16 after a week of you being gone.'Like I said like talking to a goldfish,10 second memory.
December 8th, 2009 at 7:29 pm
OK it said it was too long so here iss the other half of my 'little' comment..
.I cant count how many times I have had this 'talk' with him…you leave me alone forbusiness travel but you eat out at nice places,talk to grown ups,have a room to yourself and can even go to the bathroom alone….while 'I' eat mac and cheese, hotdogs, McDonalds, go potty with banging on the door asking stupid questions and listen to NickJr preschool shows the same ones over and over and over. So dont tell me how rough you had it and how tired you are when you're out of town AND I want and need to know that I was missed for more then just the length of a phone call.' This works for a day or two and he gets over the top mushy and its waaaaay too much then it stops cold.So with my alpha its all or nothing…. Like a goldfish
December 8th, 2009 at 7:38 pm
WOW Carol let it all out, we are here for you and on your side.
December 8th, 2009 at 7:42 pm
You crack me up!!! Have I mentioned before how much I LOVE text-messaging? Not only is it so cool and convenient for text cyber sex with my cyber-boyfriends (not to mention all the naughty pics you can text…yowza!). But it is the way Wes and I have our best touchy-feely talks. He knows he has to "talk" to me when I send him a text like that. If he ignores a text like that he knows he is in reallllly deep shit so he always responds. That means we actually have some of our best touchy-feely talks by text messaging. Sad, isn't it? But at least I'm glad I found something that works.
December 8th, 2009 at 7:43 pm
Well its been a looong week…oh wait its only Tuesday….a person can only take the Wiggles singing for so long before they go nuts…I already have a twitch… my only Mr Wiggle will be home tonight and he had better NOT be reading his Alpha training manual on the plane.Maybe Wes and David can get a time share condo/doghouse
December 8th, 2009 at 7:44 pm
damn …see I cant even spell…its suppose to say 'My OWN Mr Wiggle'….I need a drink…
December 8th, 2009 at 7:47 pm
The problem I have with Wes is if I try to talk to him in person his eyes glaze over and he just stares at me like he's in a coma or something. He doesn't respond. It's like talking to a wall. I wanna tap his forehead and shout, "Hey! Anyone in there?!!!" So that's why text-messaging works for us.
Carol….David really needs to get it together with the over-the-top phone calls and then ignoring you in person. Send him the email with this post. These Alphas need proof of the error of their ways. No wonder he loves me so much. No wonder Wes gets him in trouble all the time and he doesn't even know the guy. Love it!!!! LMAO!!!
December 8th, 2009 at 7:51 pm
Why doesn't he have a civilian phone like the rest of us? Buy him one, add it to your plan, and use his money to pay for it. Would that work? Hey, you can blame this brilliant idea on me too. Tell him it's a strategic marriage tool. Gotta have it. DON'T leave home without it! LOL
December 8th, 2009 at 7:51 pm
Gotta lay off that country music, Carol. LMAO!!!!
December 8th, 2009 at 7:56 pm
I take it you dont really know who the Wiggles are huh? They are 4 grown men wearing Star Trek wanna be costumes jumping around singing kid songs along with a neurotic pirate with a big feather and a nerve hitting laugh and a green dinosaur.And they play the same episodes for what seems like weeks and the kids sit there like that goldfish….they watch like they have never ever seen it before.Oh goody now Olivia is on the talking pig cartoon…see me twitch?????
December 8th, 2009 at 8:03 pm
No, I don't know the Wiggles. Good thing. But when I read that I remembered how my brothers went psycho when their kids were hooked on Barney. Their kids would play Barney over and over again, and then buy the movies and the videos and play them over and over again, and it was endless purple hell. So I kinda figured the Wiggles were the new Barney Torture for parents. Only this time the dinosaur is green. Do you think that's why your daughter thought Barbie looked prettier with the green head? LMAO!!!
December 8th, 2009 at 8:04 pm
I guess I havent told you his nickname ….Squeaky' ….I did ask him to carry one before but all I got was 'Whats wrong with my gov't phone?It works fine besides I dont want to carry two phones'….so I dropped it right after I decded hitting him on the head wouldnt really work,it would just make me feel better…
December 8th, 2009 at 8:07 pm
You just might be recieving a very large and screaming box in the mail…and it's not gonna have a return label on it just a note taped to the top and its gonna say 'For Laura….feed and water daily her name is Sophie'
December 8th, 2009 at 8:11 pm
Squeaky???? OMG!!!! As for not wanting to carry two phones, I have one word for that…BULLSHIT! He can carry one on each hip. That's why they make those little holder thingys. He'll get more calls and texts on his civillian phone than he will on his gov. phone after a while. Plus, you can cybersex on it. Knowing David, that will make him smile.
But you can't ask him about this, girlfriend! Just do it. Get the phone and add it to your plan (make sure it has a camera and free texting) and tell him it's a X-mas gift he bought for himself to keep his marriage together. If he starts to growl then mention how much fun it is to text naughty pics to each other. I can just see the 12-year old smile on his face when you say that.
December 8th, 2009 at 8:21 pm
K….I'll just tell him 'Laura made me do it'…..maybe I should get a t-shirt that says that…. He is so funny whenever I start a ssentence with 'Laura says….' LOL.
December 8th, 2009 at 8:26 pm
Alrightyyyyyyy! You should get a few t-shirts for you and Kat that say "Laura Made Me Do It" and "Laura Says….". That will scare the shit outta him. Too funny! And you know how much I love taking the "blame" when it comes to our latest torture ideas for David. LMAO!!!!
December 8th, 2009 at 8:33 pm
You could have your own line of shirts and panties all saying "Laura made me do it' …you'd be rolling in the money honey….you could reach out and touch all the Alphas in the world with just a pair of panties and matching teddie!!!!!
December 8th, 2009 at 9:17 pm
Great idea!
Hey, I thought I was already touching all the horny pervy Alphas in the world with my naughty lingerie pics. Of course, I'm just reaching out and touching their dicks that way.
But with my own line of "Laura Made Me Do It…" lingerie I would be shaking up their Alpha marriages (for the better) all over the world….much to their dismay. Wow, how can I resist. I LIKE it!!! ROFL
December 8th, 2009 at 11:20 pm
I love it!! I am not married to an Alpha but I know plenty ( and work for one, you know who..) and they can drive me to drink. I love that my hubby is totally a Beta and great and those of you that are married to Alphas I salute you because while they are HOT, HOT, HOT you tend to work hard at them. That said, I love men!! No matter what kind!! *wink*
December 9th, 2009 at 12:33 am
Hi, Holly (big wave!)–
I thought you might get a kick out of this. Chuck is an Alpha? No wonder he and I hit it off so well. Too funny! Yeah, those Alphas can drive you to drink. I just got back from dinner with Wes, and he was full of Alpha-isms. I'm thinking that will be my Friday blog post. *LOL* You are sooooo lucky to be married to a Beta. Yeah, those Alphas are HOT, but they are a lot of work. On the other hand I totally agree with you. Some are work and some aren't, but all yummy guys are worth it. Purrrrrrrr……! *lusty grin*
December 8th, 2009 at 7:47 pm
Like I said before 'gov't phone'…cant text and he takes forever to email back I could grow old…well older….by ALOT… just sitting around waiting
December 8th, 2009 at 8:15 pm
Of course! Sophie is the devil child who is channeling me. Gotta love the girl for that, right? *LMAO!!!
December 9th, 2009 at 3:01 am
Laura, yousaid exactly what I was thinking–what seems to work best for you is when WesKNOWS that you're mad at him. It's probably tiring (and upsetting) for you to do it, but you've got to blow up at him at least once a week (just until you re-train him, that is)! And look at the benefits you reap–you get a warm and cuddly beta!:)
December 9th, 2009 at 12:28 pm
True, Auntee. In fact I approached the touchy-feely-loving-me-passionately stuff again last night when we were out to dinner, and he was hysterical. So I'm sure this will be my Friday blog post. What can I say? The man is a riot!!! LMAO!!
Still, like you said, it's not fun for a happy Beta to have to get upset every week just to get some kind words from her Uber-Alpha husband. Good thing I've learned my lesson. My next husband will be an Alpha, but NOT an Uber. Shivers!!! Too much WORK!!!