Wes is in Deep Doo-Doo
Thursday night Wes and I went out to dinner. First, let me say Wes is one of those Uber-Alpha perfectionists who always sees the glass half empty. Really. It’s NEVER half full for the man. And since the economy has been crazy for the last two years he’s been more negative than ever. Ugh! Thus, all the meltdowns I’ve had over our marriage the last two years.
Thursday night was one of those times. After Wes had cranked about everything he could think of, he started complaining about getting me a gift for Valentine’s Day.
Let me say right now some of this is probably my fault. I’m just too easy on the man, and he’s terribly spoiled. You know how some husbands stress over the holidays, not knowing what to get their wives and hoping it will be something she likes? Not so with Wes. He knows exactly what to get me because I make it easy for him. I tell him. Plus, I’m a cheap date. Can’t get any easier than that, ya know?
And what he usually gets me is a Borders gift card or cash. Since we found out my local Waldenbooks was closing he’s been giving me cash (like at Christmas). No, I’m not one of those women insulted by cash. I can be bought. Easily. *slutty grin*
Thursday night was the third time that week he had complained about giving me cash for Valentine’s Day. I ignored the first two times because Valentine’s Day is my fav holiday of the year, and I’m not gonna let anyone rain on my parade.
But enough is enough! So the third time he complained, I blew.
My first thought was I’m not wearing my wedding ring anymore. If being married to me is so miserable, why should I be the only one to value our marriage, right?
Grrrrrrrrrrrr….!
Then I fired off three text messages to him on Friday morning, since I work late and get up after he leaves.
Have I mentioned lately how much I LOVE texting Wes? It’s improved the communication in our marriage 1000%. An Uber-Alpha like Wes is not an easy guy to talk to about this touchy-feely stuff. He’s very fond of telling people he “does NOT discuss.” And it’s true. Talking to him is like talking to a brick wall. No response. Or he denies everything I say.
Grrrrrrrrrrr…!
But he has to read a text from me, so I do get my point across that way. Anyway, here are the three text messages I sent him:
1.) I’m still really pissed at u. Last night was the 3rd time this week you’ve complained about giving me $ for V-day. You’ve been giving me Borders gift cards and/or cash almost every holiday since 2007. I don’t know why ur so against it this time. So fuck it. I don’t want any gift from you.
2.) I’m really fed up with how negative you’ve been the last 2 years since the economy dipped. U complain about everything when ur around me. Ur obviously very unhappy with ur life, me & our marriage since u never have anything good to say about it. So I am declaring our marriage OPEN. Go find a woman who makes u happy. One u will be happy to fuck and give a V-day gift to. That’s obviously NOT me. We have to use condoms anyway now, so u won’t be giving me anything nasty. But I’m finished with u. Period.
3.) PS: You usually only give me a $50 Borders gift card for V-day. I don’t know why $50 is such a crime this year. But it doesn’t matter now, since I want nothing from you AND I’ve stopped wearing my wedding ring.
An hour later Wes walks though the door. I’m in the kitchen eating breakfast and feeding the cats. Okay, it’s noon, but cut me some slack…I worked until 3:00am that morning. lol
“I’m sorry I’m so awful to live with,” Wes says, looking at me warily, like I might attack him. Good. He needs to keep his distance when I’m this pissed.
“I see you got my text messages,” I reply, glaring at him while I munch on pecans.
“I don’t want to split up,” he replies, walking toward me and folding me into his arms. Brave man.
“Could’ve fooled me,” I snort. “You don’t make me feel wanted or loved. Complaining about giving me a Valentine’s Day gift is reallllllly low. Besides, $50 is chicken feed, and you know it. I should have asked for $500.”
“I’m sorry,” he says. I let him kiss my cheek, but I don’t look happy about it.
“So you wanna date other women and find one who makes you happy?” I shrug. “Fine with me. I could care less.”
“No, I don’t want to date other woman.”
“Well, you’re one miserable guy being married to me,” I say. “All you do is bitch and complain around me. Do you save this up all day just for me? Or are you this way with everyone? I doubt it.” I narrow my eyes at him. “BTW, I hate your guts right now.”
“I know,” he says, hugging me tightly. “I deserve that.”
“You’ve been negative and depressing for the last two years. I can’t stand it anymore. Go find some other woman to torture with this crap.”
Wes apologizes again. Turns out he came home to ask if we needed anything from the store, since a major snowstorm was supposed to hit the city that afternoon. He didn’t read my text messages until he pulled into the driveway. I told him we had everything we needed, so he put fresh batteries in the flashlights and left to meet his buds for lunch. Then he went to his fav bar to watch ballgames the rest of the day.
That evening a friend with a 4-wheel drive SUV brought him home in the middle of the snowstorm. We both drive Camrys, and his friend thought he wouldn’t be able to make it home in his car with the snow piling up like an inch per hour.
After he takes a shower he corners me in the hallway. “I don’t want an open marriage,” he says. “I don’t want to fuck other women.”
“You sure?” I ask. “Totally works for me. We use condoms, so it’s not like you’re gonna give me a STD.”
Wes just growls, and the next thing I know he backs me up against the wall. His hands are under the Led Zep t-shirt I’m wearing, and he’s pinching my nipples.
Alrightyyyyy!
“These nipples seem neglected,” he observes, pulling off my t-shirt and lowering his head to take my neglected breast into his mouth.
Alrightyyyyy!
We ended up having very frisky sex. Okay, I’m easy when it comes to sex. But the open-marriage-not-wearing-my-wedding-ring issue is still on the table as far as I’m concerned. I’ve had it. This negative crap has got to STOP.
In the meantime, Wes has been unbelievably attentive and positive. Hey, if he wants to use LOTS of sex to convince me to drop the open marriage thing, I can handle that. *sex-obsessed grin*
So far so good. Stay tuned…
xoxo
Laura Stamps ©
The Magickal Sex Goddess
Author of Paranormal Erotica & Romance Novels
(Witches, Shapeshifters, Vampires)
laura@laurastamps.com
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February 15th, 2010 at 1:39 pm
I have to say I am giving you a great big atta girl!!! I hear ya, with the way things have been in this country everyone seems to have something negative to say and the last thing you need is to get that at home!! Not that I ever doubted you, way to go girl!! I have a deal with my friends that when we go out anywhere there is no negative talk!! I feels great, a buddy of mine and I actually got up and left another guy in the restaurant last week because he was seriously bringing us down, Paul told him, knock it off or we are outta here, and he had the nerve to be shocked as hell when we left!!! Men! Anyway, I had to give a big 3 cheers for this!! XOXO
February 15th, 2010 at 2:24 pm
Bcause i live with an alpha man all i can do is lmao, you handled it very well. I totaly understand and feel that way at times myself, and when my honey reads this he see i am not the only one who feels this way at times.
I have to say that Tim gave me a nice VDay gift and i did not ask for a thing. I just did not think we were doing it this year, do to the prodject we are on. But he suprised me with a nice gift, but gifted him later in the day. *;)*
February 15th, 2010 at 3:12 pm
I'm telling you Laura, Wes responds/behaves better when you're constantly mad at him. What's up with that? It's almost like how little kids act–they push you so far to see how much they can get away with, and then are all contrite when you blow! It must be exhausting for you, being such a positive person, to have to throw a fit every now and then to get him to appreciate you! It's like Wes loves being in the doghouse or something…
I say leave that wedding ring off (unless/until you see an improved attitude) and give him something to think about! Stay strong!:D
February 15th, 2010 at 4:16 pm
And I thought I had it bad with a 'I-have-to-be-serious-all-the-time-and-NEVER-smile-pain-in-the-arse' alpha…its hard to be happy when he is always complaining about money either here or at work. And he too is like talking to a brick wall. Just like last week we were watching a comedy on tv and I was laughing so hard I had tears in my eyes and he just sat there with a frown.I asked him if he was having hearing problems again and he had the nerve to tell me he 'was laughing in the inside' Give me a break!.David hates to spend money,infact the other day he yelled at me because I bought 4 ebooks that totaled $12 two of the books were freebies.I had to explain to him that since he travels so much I need something to do when he was gone and it could of been alot worse then $12.He shut up but not for long.Now he did take me out to dinner for V-day and that shocked the pants off me…but then again he left for Afghanistan yesterday.'Im thinking he was trying to make me happy so I woulnt go on a spending spree when he was gone…But kuddos to you for sticking to your guns and dont give in! Nice to know there are others out there with the same kind of problem….
February 15th, 2010 at 5:01 pm
Thanks, girlfriend! Being negative is EASY. It's always been the norm. To go against the norm takes some effort. But it is a metaphysical law that "like attracts like." The more negative you talk the more you attract negativity into your life. I decided decades ago I couldn't afford negative talk coz I have always run my own biz. But getting it from Wes 24/7 is just toooooo much! So I agree with you 100%, and you know exactly what you mean coz you run your own biz too.
February 15th, 2010 at 5:02 pm
I thought you could relate. *lmao* Yeah, Tim should read this and get a clue. Glad you had a wonderful V-day. You go, gf!!!
February 15th, 2010 at 5:08 pm
See, Auntee? This is why NONE of the heroes in my novels are Alpha men. They act like kids. They are NOT romantic. The only thing I can figure is these authors have never dated or married an Alpha man. Why else would they think they are so romantic? NOT! Of course it is easy to have conflict in a novel with an Alpha hero coz they are ALWAYS screwing up big-time!
Yes, it is exhausting and I have had it. 5 meltdowns for me in 2 years is waaaaay too many for this Beta. So I'm still pissed and the wedding ring is still off. And I am still asking him about an open marriage. I really have had it this time. It's getting rdiiculous, ya know?
In a way you could call this blog "The Anatomy of an Alpha Marriage." HORRORS! lmao!! But I will say this. No more Alpha men for me. My next husband is gonna be a sweet Beta or Gamma. No doubt about it.
February 15th, 2010 at 5:10 pm
It's insane, isn't it, Carol? I mean how hard is it to smile and laugh and try to be positive and not obsess about money all the time when you have enough money to pay your bills? Yeesh! Hey, and David is the one who bought you the Kindle. He shouldn't have done that if he didn't want you to buy ebooks for it. Duh!!
February 15th, 2010 at 5:43 pm
David thought if he got me a Kindle I wouldnt spend as much on books.he is so naive.Some days I want to use the kindle to bop him over the head!.The thing that got me upset is when we went to dinner Saturday night we went with two other couples,the men worked with David one was his Deputy(Don) and the other was(Keith) the one he was going to Afghanistan with. I sat across from Keith who is retired special forces,navy seal,has large nasty scars covering both arms and I imagine other places as well from the way he spoke anyway this guy was the happiest,hold no bars kinda guy who told me that he was like David all alpha serious and never really lived but once you look death in the eye you learn to enjoy the smallest of everything.I think he is taking David under his wings so to speak.David needs to be afraid very afraid.Anyway,he insisted on me and David going to dance classes with him and his girlfriend and you should of seen the look on Davids face! It was pure horror,then Keith said if David didnt want to dance he could sit and watch him dance with me I agreed to go and wont David be surprised to be going to dance class when they get back!?opefully they wont let these two men have any live ammo cause one of them my not come back
February 15th, 2010 at 6:04 pm
I love it!!! Yeah, death or serious illness changes a person. It makes you appreciate life more. David has just had it waaaaaay too easy. Time to turn the torture UP, gf!! Dance class sounds like just the ticket. lmao!!!!
February 16th, 2010 at 12:29 am
You know what would be nice? If there was a man that was a sweet beta in everyday life and an alpha in bed! I mean a hot sexy lusty alpha that takes charge and is all about pleasing his woman! Wow! Do any men like that exist? LOL.
February 16th, 2010 at 12:41 am
I dont know if they do or not but when or if you find this mythical creature will you share?
February 16th, 2010 at 12:50 am
Absolutely!
February 16th, 2010 at 12:57 am
Ladies, of course they exist! A Gamma is part Alpha, part Beta. Think Donnie, Wynn, and Dray from my Witchery Series novels. Gammas are my favs. You get the best of both worlds with them. Yummmmy! Wynn lets Noelle get away with whatever she wants, and Donnie is soooo sweet to Savannah. But remember what happened with Greer? Don't mess with Donnie and Wynn when the Alpha comes out of their Gamma.
Of course Blaine was hot too, even though he is a Beta. Purrrrr….!
February 16th, 2010 at 11:09 pm
Awww Laura men are such doo doo heads sometimes. You tell 'em! Hehe.
February 16th, 2010 at 11:24 pm
Thanks, Kenjii! Doo-doo heads. I love it! Yeah, it seems to happen a lot to those freaking Alpha men in my life. lol