You’ve Fucked Up One Time Too Many, Dude!
All I can say is it was an AWESOME two weeks leading up to my 53rd birthday last Friday. I must have received over 200 emails, PMs, DMs, cards, and calls, as well as tons of postings from friends, readers, and fans at EONS, Facebook, PaganSpace, and Twitter wishing me a happy birthday. Most said they wanted to send their gifts and good wishes early, because they didn’t wanna miss my special day.
Wow! Thanks, everyone! I was totally overwhelmed with your love and kindness. It meant the world to me. Really. Like I always say, you are the BEST!!
So how did my birthday go on the homefront? Funny you should ask…
Because Wes plays golf on Fridays, he knew he’d be home late that night, so he suggested we celebrate my b-day on Thursday night by going out to the restaurant of my choice. Cool. I chose one of my fav restaurants because even though I don’t ordinarily eat sugar I do splurge on my b-day. And this particular restaurant has killer apple cobbler and ice cream.
Wes likes to eat dinner early (like 5:00-ish) because he hates waiting to be seated. In fact, when you look in the dictionary under the word “impatient” you’ll find his name. So imagine my surprise when he’s a no-show on Thursday night.
Huh?
Finally, I text him at 6:00 to see if he’s changed his mind. Columbia is the capital of South Carolina, and we live in Yuppie-land, so the restaurants tend to get crowded early. He texts back a few minutes later to say he’ll be home soon, and we can still go out. That’s when I realize he’s at the bar with his buds and probably forgot we were celebrating my birthday that night.
Okay, whatever.
He finally shows, and it’s almost 7:00 by the time we get to the restaurant. Miraculously, they seat us right away, and dinner goes well. It’s my birthday dinner, so I’m in the mood to celebrate, and I’m having a blast. Several of the servers have become friends of mine, and some are members of my Facebook Fan Page and readers of this blog. So it’s kinda like a friend party at the restaurant.
Plus, we were really lucky to get one of my fav servers that night. He’s so good at what he does he’s also a trainer. Not to mention he’s always in a good mood. In fact, when he brought our dessert he stuck a pink candle in it, lit it, and wouldn’t leave until I made a wish and blew it out.
What fun!
However the trouble started when we finished eating. Wes has this “King of the World” thing going where the minute he finishes eating at a restaurant he wants to jump up and leave immediately. Of course, that isn’t possible because he isn’t the only customer in that restaurant. So he spends the rest of the time grumbling and complaining (often loudly) until the server gets our bill to us, and Wes can leave. Thursday night was no exception.
Because we know the server, I took a few extra minutes to chat with him and thank him for the candle. But while we’re chatting, Wes suddenly jumps up and walks briskly out of the restaurant.
The server is shocked. He looks at me with a stunned expression on his face and asks, “He just left you????”
I laugh because I think Wes is playing with me. He’d been overserved at his bar, and he does weird shit when he’s had too much to drink. I scurry out after him, laughing and waving goodbye to everyone as I leave.
But when I catch up with Wes in the parking lot I discover he left me because he’s furious with me.
Huh?
“You talk too much!” he yells. “You knew I wanted to leave, and you kept talking anyway.”
Let me stop right here and say the only thing Wes has to do after dinner every night is yell at his computer (which he hates) for about 30 minutes. Then park his ass in his reclining chair and watch sports on TV.
Don’t worry. He wasn’t mad at me because he was jealous. The man doesn’t have a jealous bone in his bod. He was mad because he thought I was wasting his time. This was an all-about-Wes thing.
“Chill, hon, it was my birthday dinner,” I reply. “So I had a good time and talked to people. Besides, you were the one who came home late.”
I’m still dashing after him, because he’s walking really fast while he’s yelling at me.
“Damn,” I say when we reach his car, “you’re walking so fast you act like you would’ve driven off and left me.”
“You’re right,” he sneers. “I would’ve left your ass if you hadn’t come after me.”
Okay, now I’m pissed.
Wes has been having these hissy fits over silly shit ever since the economy went down the toilet two years ago. But he can’t just work harder and wait for the economy to recover like everyone else. Oh, no. He has to indulge in a 24-hour pity party and spend his evenings with his drinking buds at his fav bar.
Of course, when we get home and he sobers up he’s horrified at what he did and how he ruined my birthday dinner. Once again, the next day I get flowers. You know the kind. The I-hope-these-flowers-get-me-out-of-the-doghouse-AGAIN kind.
Those of you who’ve been reading this blog know this is the third batch of those flowers I’ve received this year, and it’s just the first week of April. Yeesh!
Hey, I know what you’re thinking. This is a replay of his Valentine’s Day fuck-up and his I-waanna-divorce fuck-up in February. Geez, I could’ve just edited one of those blog posts and run it today as the Birthday Dinner fuck-up. LOL
But you know what? The dude has fucked up one time too many as far as I’m concerned.
I’m totally fed up with asshole Alpha men this year. That’s common knowledge. I’m soooo tired of them clipping my wings and telling me the way I act and think and talk is wrong. Hey, I’m an attractive, positive, happy, hardworking, delusional slut who loves to fuck. What’s not to like, right? 
Unfortunately, I’m exactly the kind of person who irritates an asshole Alpha like Wes. He’s always fond of saying “happy people make his ass twitch.” And it’s true. They irritate the hell outta him.
Do I care? Nah. The dude needs to get his act together. And fast. I’ve gotten rid of almost every Alpha man in my life this year. You could say I’m in a “spring cleaning” phase right now (wicked grin). My agent is gone, and I’m running Kittyfeather Press again. Happily. Successfully. Joyfully.
Wes is the only Alpha man left in my life. Uh-oh.
Yeah, I’m more than tired of being penalized by Alpha assholes for being me. I’m tired of this shitty treatment, and I’m not taking it anymore. These days this SexWitch is claws out. If you’re an Alpha man DO NOT FUCK WITH ME! It could be a scary thing.
The next evening (my birthday) I cornered Wes in the kitchen, and we had a long, “intense” talk (he would probably use the adjective “painful” rather than “intense”). As you all know, he’s one of those Alphas who does NOT like to discuss anything, especially emotional stuff. But I would not be denied, so I kept after him until he opened up. An hour later we both felt much better, and he has decided he needs to be more affectionate toward me.
We shall see.
So far he’s trying hard. Again. *shakes my head*
xoxo
Laura Stamps ©
The Magickal SexWitch
Author of Paranormal Erotica & Romance Novels
(Witches, Shapeshifters, Vampires)
laura@laurastamps.com
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April 8th, 2010 at 8:40 am
Wow that drinking gets him into way to much trouble. He really needs to think about what he is saying when he has had to much to drink and if it is not how he really feels about things. Then he needs to take a few steps back, and slow down on the drinking. So he can enjoy the life he has and the woman thats good to him. He thinks life suck right, the man does not see that it could be a lot worse. He could be with out a job, home, and wife. Many people have lost everything, and not over the economy, but over the crazy drinking. Yes the economy is bad but dont use it as an excuse to drink or to be a but. Life is to short and the older we get the shorter it gets, live it like you may not have tomarrow. Then every thing looks a lot brighter and clearer.
April 8th, 2010 at 1:51 pm
It's nice you gave Wes another chance. You seem to enjoy him so much.
I learned a long time ago…okay, maybe just 3-4 years ago, men are going to fuck up. They can't help it. It's in their nature. It's like the scorpion who asked the frog for a lift across the river.
Perhaps he would do good to learn his drinking limits.
There's nothing becoming about an angry drunk. Good for you for expressing yourself and setting your foot down.
I know I'm all over the place. Sorry about that. But being with Wes for so many years, you know HEA is more of a balancing act than a switch you flip.
April 8th, 2010 at 2:27 pm
I can't believe we is in the doghouse again! Doesn't he think you are serious, Laura? He should feel lucky to be with an incredible woman like you! But no, instead he treats you like crap, knowing he can get out of the doghouse again if he works real hard. This man drives me insane! Okay, done with my rant now…lmao. Anyways, I just hope Wes realizes how much of a prick he is to you, and decides to change it for the long term. I know he's a good guy when he wants to be, but he just needs to get his act together. And, if him drinking too much is the problem, which it sounds like it is, maybe he needs to stop drinking for a while? Either that or just cut down his drinking habits. I say this because you are a wonderful woman, Laura, you deserve the best, and I know the Goddess agrees.
April 8th, 2010 at 3:07 pm
Laura Baby, the guys out here (well, at least this guy) don't want to fuck with you. We just want to fuck you, period. Hard to believe Wes doesn't appreciate what he has–a yeah baby from the word go. They're hard to find, as any guy will tell you. Too bad you don't have an open relationship so you can be appreciated by more guys.
April 8th, 2010 at 3:38 pm
At least you know how to understand ands deals with Wes's Alpha-ness, lol. I don't know if I could.
April 8th, 2010 at 10:26 pm
Thanks, Reena! Yeah, Wes has certainly been on a roll the last two years. Whew! But so far he is doing good staying out of the doghouse for this latest fuck-up. Altho he almost fell into it again on Monday night.
It's a delicate balance. If he is changing as he gets older, and it is in a way that is not nourishing to my self-esteem then I have some hard choices to make. But if this is a phase he can snap out of we will be okay.
It's just a bitch Alpha men are so complicated, ya know? But I guess they can't all be easy sluts like me. lmao!!!!
April 8th, 2010 at 10:29 pm
You got it, Beach. Vodka is NOT his friend. lmao!!! Maybe all these fuck-ups will the the thing that will convince him he needs to get a better attitude.
I saw some encouragement of that last night. He picked up a pot of mine outside that was full of wet soil. He tipped it over and thought all the water was gone. But when he dropped it all the black water shot up and covered him in mud. The old Wes would have been furious. But he is trying hard to behave so he just laughed. A miracle since he has never been able to laugh at himself. So far so good!
April 8th, 2010 at 10:31 pm
Thanks, Kristen!! You are such a sweetheart!! I know. Wes is in the doghouse so much I'm gonna sugest he do some interior decorating to make it more comfortable since he spends a LOT of time there so far in 2010.
April 8th, 2010 at 10:34 pm
Thanks, Dave!! Alpha men tend to think they're right all the time, and they can do no wrong. They rarely listen to anyone esle. The only thing that works well with them is shock treatment. Thus, the three "treatments" Wes has received from me so far this year. lmao!
But i'm totally with ya. Fucking is a verrrry good thing. And the more the merrier. Purrrrrrrrrrr….! *kinky grin*
April 8th, 2010 at 10:37 pm
Thanks, Kenjii! It ain't easy. This multiple personality thing he's got going is exhausting!!! Hopefully, it will end soon before he wears this slut out emotionally. All this drama is such a waste of time, IMO, when we could be fucking ya know? *sex-obsessed grin*
April 9th, 2010 at 2:56 am
There are a few (me included) Beta males out there who would love to treat you some good times, maybe several at a time… hint hint…. but I think you might get some traction from telling Wes, that there could be… AT ANY TIME… people who observe him treating you this way in public who would quit doing business with him because of his drunken behavior. I mean, I agree with all your peeps above, especially Dave, who states what we all feel. Wes is a lucky guy…. if he did not have you…. with his attitude he would be one lonely man, bitter and angry. But VERY alone.
April 9th, 2010 at 3:10 am
A Beta man menage? DAMNATION, Joe, you know how to make this kinkster smile. Alrightyyyyy! Sounds good to me.
Thanks for your sweet comments, Joe! You truly make me feel loved, and I adore you for it. Sending you lots of wet kisses…..!
April 11th, 2010 at 6:03 am
Well all I can say is….. You are so close to becoming financially independent and the day you are I'll be throwing confetti in your direction cuz I know you'll be leaving this dysfunctional marriage in a heartbeat. You're chained to an alcoholic and a verbal bully. I'm truly shocked you have stuck with him this long. Sorry to be blunt but that's the way I feel. There are plenty of nice guys out there… so starting looking….
April 11th, 2010 at 6:22 am
Hi, Jan, great to hear from you!! Actually, I have been financially independent for a long time. And Wes has only been fucking up like this for the last two years. But I agree. That was the last straw. And I am totally fed up.
However, you know how it is. I have decades invested in this marriage. I want to give him every chance I can before I walk. Then when and if I do, I'll have no regrets, because I know I did the best I could. What can I say? Strange as that may sound, the "no regrets" thing is important to me.
April 12th, 2010 at 11:00 pm
Laura, I can totally relate to the "no regrets" thing. I didn't invest nearly as many years in my marriage, but I knew things weren't going to work with Joseph and I in our first year of marriage. However, I stayed for another 5 years trying to work things out, and better my marriage. In the end, I realized that no matter what, I couldn't change him into the man I wanted him to be, and I also knew I couldn't stay any longer in a marriage I was so unhappy in. So, I applaud you for staying in your marriage, giving it your all so that if you do leave, you will know there was nothing more you could do, and you wouldn't have any regrets.